


A study in human sexuality

by satans_dolly_boy666



Series: I won´t hesitate BITCH *and then I write a Johnlock fic* [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Demisexual Sherlock Holmes, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Friendship/Love, M/M, One Shot, Sexual Sherlock Holmes, Sexuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-11-21 09:27:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18140420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/satans_dolly_boy666/pseuds/satans_dolly_boy666
Summary: Sherlock Holmes knows many things, he is a very intelligent and curious person. Above all, curious. But even the incredible Sherlock has doubts and questions, especially when it comes to human sexuality. Maybe finding the answers means having a good friend by your side.





	1. The uncertain and new, and a hug.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a pretty short story!  
> Many times I feel like Sherlock, especially because I'm 25 and I've never had sex lol I consider myself asexual since I was 14 but, well, life is unpredictable.  
> All that I know about sex up to now is thanks to your horny fics and because of gay comics.
> 
> *Ghostbusters music.-- I+M An AdUlT VirgIn~*

**Sexuality**.

 _A noun_.

It carries the capacity for sexual feelings, a person's sexual orientation/preference and finally, the sexual activity. Basically, it has to do with the sexual habits and desires of a person. But for me, it means nothing.

 

I always say that _“I consider myself married to my work”_ since my sexual life is non-existent and, to be honest, I never cared about it.

When I met John, the connection between us was instantaneous.

 

We immediately sense a connection that indicates we share something. **Maybe the adventure; maybe the danger outside; maybe the mystery.**

John is a simple man: he just needs food, a little peace and sex.

My observations towards him always indicated his urges and the strong desire for the sex act. He is completely the opposite of me. He needs the warmth of a person; I do not tolerate human touch. He needs the ecstasy of sex; I simply need the ecstasy of my work.

 

Or that is what I thought.

 

All started with a hug. Well, with two hugs to be precise.

The first time, it was a “happy hug.” It was during his wedding when I was finishing my Best Man speech. Everyone was excited, some were actually crying and I could only ask _"what´s wrong?"_ The hug was casual and John was the one who started it. It was a friendly hug to show gratitude.

The second time was different, and it was a “sad hug.” When Mary died, John was devastated. We went through a difficult time and our friendship was put in doubt, or at least it was by him. For me, he was always and he will always be my best friend no matter the circumstances. John was crying but not like at the wedding. There was no smile, no happiness. My reaction was innate, and this time I was the one who hugged him. _“It´s ok”_ I said, _“it´s what it´s.”_

 

The times where there was a hug between us, I felt that maybe human contact is not as bad as it seems.

To my surprise, I wanted to experience more about the so-called human contact, but with the exception that it has to include John and only him, **no one else.**


	2. Kissing.

Our life together was still pretty good despite the daily conflicts, and this time it also includes changes.

First, _Rosamund_ , John's daughter, lives with us for obvious reasons since she is still a little girl.

The second change includes more **tension** between us, but it is a strange, unusual, and not truly negative tension.

 

There are moments that we are submerged in the silence of the flat, each of us watching surreptitiously at the other and smiling a little at the same time.

I do not remember when it happened, but our friendship escalated to another degree: that of **sexual** and **romance**.

It is not that I have never kissed before, it is a fairly simple action that do not require taking off clothes and I was ok with that.

 

But as usual, **with John everything is different**.

 

The first time, I approached John and I just decided to kiss him without warning.

 

_"What was that for?"_

_"Experiment."_

_"Experiment. A bloody experiment based on a casual kiss to your best friend? Really, Sherlock."_

 

The second time happened during a case in which we needed to sneak into a gay bar to get evidence about the suspect ( ~~or rather, so that I can deduce the alleged killer.~~ ) A man, almost 34 years old, single, recently divorced and an office worker, interrupted us. He was clearly interested in me and he did not have the slightest shame to hide it. He was a persistent guy, and no matter how rude I was with him or how much I made it clear my rejection towards him, he did not stop trying to seduce me.

 _“I like guys that make me beg, especially if they are as delicate in appearance as you are.”_ **Disgusting**.

 

My patience was about to reach a limit, and without doubt, violence was the first option. John had separated from me, but when he returned he could witness my discomfort and my bad mood.

 _"What's happening here?, Sherlock?”_ Oh John, my savior. I did not explain the situation in which I was in, I just grabbed him by the neck and kissed him. John was paralyzed for a few minutes.

_"You see? I've got a partner. Now, fuck off."_

 

I did not wait for his answer; I pulled John to leave the place.

 

_“You kissed me a second time and I doubt it's for an experiment.”_

_“John, you´re always so wise with your deductions.”_

 

We did not say anything all the way home.


	3. Releasing the tension.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A warning for lustfulness(?)

Several days after the night at the gay bar, John made no mention of the kiss.

So neither I did.

That strange tension between us began to intensify.

I do not know necessary how to explain how I feel near John, but **I want more**.

 

One day, after work, John had to do the typical adult things: pay bills, going to the bank, paperwork.

Dull. Boring.

That is why he arrived late.

 

_“And Rosie? Is she with Mrs Hudson again?”_

 

_“Of course not, it´s already too late for Mrs Hudson to take care of her. She´s sleeping. I fed her.”_

 

_“Oh. Right. It´s too late now. I didn´t realize, I had many things to do. What a tiresome day.”_

 

_“Mmm. Well, at least it´s Friday.”_

 

_“Yeah. Have you eaten something? Wait, don´t answer. Of course, you didn´t. I´m going to order pizza.”_

 

_“Whatever.”_

 

_“Sherlock, you need to eat. There´s no negotiation on the matter.”_

 

After calling the pizza delivery, John turned on his laptop and started typing. A few minutes later, he stopped.

 

_“Sherlock.”_

 

_“John.”_

 

_“Are we going to talk about it, or not?”_

 

_“About what, exactly?”_

 

_“You already know about what.”_

 

_“Enlighten me, doctor.”_

 

_“The kiss, Sherlock! The damned **kiss**!”_

 

_“What can I say about it? You know the definition and act of kissing, don´t you?”_

 

_“You have done it twice. Why?”_

 

_“The first time, an experiment. The second time was because of-“_

 

_“Yes, I know!”_

 

_“Well, I don´t know what is the problem here.”_

 

_“You cannot kiss everyone just because if!”_

 

_“I don´t kiss everyone, I kiss you.”_

 

_“Exactly!”_

 

_“… I don´t understand.”_

 

_“Look, mate, kissing isn´t something you can do to everyone, especially on the mouth.”_

 

_“I still don´t see the problem. It´s just **kissing**.”_

 

_“Have you ever had a girlfriend? or boyfriend, whatever.”_

 

_“Nope.”_

 

_“When you kiss your lover, you express- wait, what?”_

 

_“um?”_

 

_“You never dated someone?”_

 

_“My full-time interest is working, John, I already told you.”_

 

_“Oh. So… **Have you never had sex**? I mean-“_

 

_“I don't see why I should date someone to have sex. You are such a romantic.”_

 

_“…Right. You´re right. Well, it´s ok if you don´t want to answer me but-“_

 

_“No.”_

 

_“What?”_

 

_“I have never had sex, John. Happy now?”_

 

_“Not happy, but surprised.”_

 

_“Sex is not essential to living, although I cannot say the same for you.”_

 

_“But even if you haven't had sex, sometimes, you masturbate, don't you?”_

 

_“Why are we having this conversation? I can't relate it to the kiss.”_

 

_“Sherlock, it´s ok if you haven´t done anything yet- I- well, It´s ok if you don´t want to talk about it.”_

 

_“I don't mind if I´ve got to talk with you. It´s just… I don´t understand.”_

 

_“Understand, what?”_

 

_“This. About kissing or to have sex. I don´t understand and I don´t think I´ll ever do it.”_

 

_“You are human too, don't try to deny it.”_

 

_“Oh, shut up. **I´m a machine. You have said it before. Everyone believes it. I´m a machine that has never experienced sexual pleasure. Are you pleased now?** ”_

 

_“You´re not a machine!... so…. Have you also experienced any kind of sexual pleasure? Not even masturbating?”_

 

_“No. No even masturbating.”_

 

_“Why? I don´t believe you if you say that, at least one, you've not been horny before.”_

 

_“I don't recall being horny.”_

 

_“Wow. You never finish surprising me.”_

 

_“I don't see the big deal of it.”_

 

_“You want to try?”_

 

_“What? Try what?”_

 

_“To **masturbate**.”_

 

There was silence.

John never heard my answer but he knew in advance that I was always a curious person.

 

He approached my side, almost stuck to me. And he said in my ear:

 

_“The first step is to get **horny**. I usually watch porn but I don´t think it will work for you. When you saw Irene Adler naked, there was no effect on you.”_

 

_“Seeing someone naked and seeing people having sex are two completely different things and you know it.”_

 

_“Yes, but let's try something else. Let's use **experimentation** , let's do it on your way.”_

 

_“I don´t think It will work.”_

 

_“Let´s see…”_

 

First, he removed my blue dressing gown. Unprepared of the situation, he put his hand inside my gray t-shirt. I gasped out of astonishment.

 

_“What- John, What are you doing?”_

 

_“Many women are sensitive when I touch their chest, especially on the nipples.”_

 

_“Well, but I´m not a woman!”_

 

_“True, but you have nipples as well. Look.”_

 

He started to rub me with his hands while holding his head on my shoulder. They were subtle caresses, almost delicate.

 

I could only start breathing faster and faster. I did not understand what I was experiencing, but I was sure of something: the tension with John was now at an extreme level.

 

That's when I understood that the strange tension between us was, in fact, **sexual tension**.

 

I started to get hot, my hands were sweating and my heart started to beat very fast.

 

_“Wow Sherlock, you´re very **sensitive**!”_

 

_“Shut- Up-“_

 

It was difficult to talk when I was breathing so fast, but I could manage.

 

_“You also look very thin. And pale. You seem somewhat fragile.”_

 

I could not answer, I was concentrating on breathing. His hands went through my chest, my back, my arms, my neck, and sometimes my face.

Suddenly, he moved his hands to my hips. With gentle movements, he began to brush my hips to then reach the most private part of my body.

 

_“Look at you. And you say you´re a machine! The first step is almost complete. You look **excited**.”_

 

Without giving me time to answer, John rubbed one of his hands on my crotch, while the other was touched my thigh.

 

_“J-John. Wait. J-Just wat a minute.”_

 

_“Don´t get scared now. You'll like it, trust me.”_

 

It's not that I do not trust John, but it was all very new to me and my body. I decided to keep going with this **“experimentation.”**

 

The rubs to my crotch accelerated, but despite everything, nothing had prepared me for the next.

 

John put his hand inside my pants, and the real sensation began.

I closed my eyes and I **moaned**.

I was a subtle moan, but I was there.

 

John did not stop at any time, and my moans soon appeared stronger and clearer than before.

 

I held on to John's arm, still with my eyes closed and I felt I could not do it anymore. My body started to shake a little and a sense of fire invaded my interior.

 

**All at once, I came.**

 

I realized two things: first, I liked John´s touches to me; second, John's member was erect.

 

Neither of us could react when the pizza delivery arrived.


	4. More than touching.

After what happened, we did not even eat pizza. John washed his hands, and went to his room, leaving me alone in the living room.

I did not know how to process what happened, I was even still panting a little bit.

 

I still felt his hands all over my body. Every touch, every whisper to my ear, **everything**.

 

I could not sleep all night, and I doubt John either.

 

The next day, an awkward aura surrounded us. John did not look me in the eyes, and he even decided to go to work earlier.

I spent the whole morning thinking about what had happened, and that besides, **I wanted to experience it again**.

 

John arrived at 5:00 p.m. indicating that he did not have many patients today. He still did not look me in the eyes, and that started to bother me.

 

_“Stop it.”_

 

_“What?”_

 

_“Stop doing it.”_

 

_“Doing what?”_

 

_“Whatever you´re doing. It´s awkward. And for God´s sake, look at me!”_

 

_“Um- Yeah- Right.”_

 

_“ **Look at me.** ”_

 

_“Sherlock, I´m sorry.”_

 

_“For what?”_

 

_“Please. Don´t. You know what I mean.”_

 

_“Truly, I don´t know. I don´t know why you´re sorry.”_

 

_“Yesterday- I-“_

 

_“I liked it, and of course, and apparently, you felt the same.”_

 

_“I- Just- I don´t know!”_

 

_“I could clearly feel your erection on my back, don´t try to deny it.”_

 

_“I´m not trying to deny anything! But…”_

 

_“What.”_

 

_“…”_

 

_“ **I want to do it again.** ”_

 

_“No, Sherlock. Don´t think about it.”_

 

_“Why not? It felt good, new to me, but good after all. And you clearly enjoyed it too, even though you didn´t have your chance to finish.”_

 

_“I don´t think it´s a good idea. If there's a next time, I do not think I'll be able to leave it by just touching.”_

 

_“Then, **don´t hold back.** ”_

 

_“Sherlock… Sex is completely different from masturbation. You´ll be scared and I don´t want to ruin our friendship.”_

 

_“I know that. Masturbation sometimes is only touching; sex involves penetration.”_

 

_“Enough of being so honest with words. Yes, **it involves more than touching.** ”_

 

_“I´m ok with that.”_

 

_“Are you sure? It could hurt and be uncomfortable for you.”_

 

**_“I'm fine if it's with you.”_ **

 

Saying that John softened the lines of his face, and then, he kissed me softly on the lips.

 

Finally, I understood a little bit about the concept of **sexuality**.

This was just beginning, but my doubts were not as many as in the beginning.

 

**My sexuality involves John. **

He is an important part of my life, as a family, as a friend and as the person who made me realize that, even though I always considered myself outside the parameters of human behaviour, I am indeed a human being and that I am not excluded when it comes to emotions and sensations.

 

I understood then the obsession with sex or romance in people for the first time ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end?
> 
> I don´t think I´ll continue it, I will simply leave it with an open ending.

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance for my awful English.


End file.
